toothaches | RYSLIG IC INBOX

_{[According to popular rumor, Kelpies were supposed to be able to breathe under water. This was what Maurice had heard way back when he first started turning green.]

[Unfortunately, or perhaps fortunately, he hadn't really had the gumption to see for himself until now. He didn't have any gills that he knew of, and breathing in and out didn't feel any different than from when he was a human. So...how?]

[How was he going to find out?]

[In private of coarse! He didn't have a tub in the little flat Korra's housing provided him--just a shower. And it was a nice shower, but he felt it wouldn't really provide the Kelpie Experience. Plus, if he drowned in there, someone might find him and he just could NOT be the kelpie that drowned. If he died, nobody would know about it and he certainly wouldn't say anything once he popped back up.]

[This led him to the great outdoors. Not too far away from Fiddleford and Marco's modest dwelling, Maurice found himself at the edge of a boggy oxbow. Insects swarmed the reeds and frogs called from the far bank. The sun made the place hazy--a great place to get in touch with his monstery side. Or at least drown in private if it went wrong.]

[Maurice found it was always best to expect the worst, that way you were either always right or pleasantly surprised. He'd left his shirt hanging on a low branch because he didn't want to ruin it--he'd decorated the front of it himself. In messy letters, the shirt read: THATS HOW IT IS IN THIS BITCH OF A WORLD. He couldn't wait for Mason to see it. It was her quote after all.]

[The kelpie waded one dainty hoof after the other into the shallows with his arms out. So far so good... And then something weird happened in his brain and he picked up a hoof and brought it down again, making a huge splash. Then again. And again.]}

Ahuhuhuh...hahahah!

_{[Thanks horse brain.]}

Edited 2019-06-01 18:34 (UTC)

[Should have checked in on Fiddleford and Marco's closest neighbors, boyo.

The lake between the Bluejeans-Taaco farm and the McGucket-Evangelisti residence is the favorite hangout of both families, usually together on the better weather days, Barry and Marco out in the lake proper while the three snakes sunbathe in a pile on their favorite log. Today, however, the nerds are in the lab for work and Taako hasn't done the slither of shame home quite yet, so it's just Lup out there in the sun, the impressive length of her body both stretched out and coiled around the thick log, the very end of her tail submerged into the water.

She's napping when Maurice's whinnying echoes out just enough to rouse her. Her ears twitch, all too irritated at the interruption, but all it takes is for her to roll onto her belly and sweep her gaze across the shoreline of the lake. Not too far off, there's her second favorite horse-man, stomping his hooves and splashing around like a foal.]

Hey - [Lup curls her palm around her mouth, so her already loud voice amplifies, lips curling into a grin.]

Do you have a permit for that or what?

_{[Maurice is just having the time of his goddamn life and nearly doesn't hear Lup's call over his own ruckus. He misses the initial hey, but the naga's follow up catches his attention.]

[He does a little skip-jump of surprise and ends up tottering backwards onto his ass in the shallows. WHo--]

[The kelpie's ears instantly flatten against his skull and his chin tips upwards. IT WAS THAT SCARY LADY. He recognizes that pattern of autumn fire from all the way over here.]

[But...he didn't have a permit for that. Shame forced heat up into his face and the insides of his ears as he started to struggle to his hooves.]}

I didn't--didn't know this was private property! Sorry!

_{[Just gonna pretend she didn't see all that.]}

Edited (SORRY HTML FAIL) 2019-06-02 03:32 (UTC)

[Oh no, that's cute.

Too bad Lup's natural reaction to cuteness is just to throw her head back and laugh, loud and unrestrained, skinny shoulders trembling from the force of her laughter.]

I'm kiddin', goobus. Trust me, even if we owned this whole damn lake, I'd let a handsome horse like you in. Gotta keep the eye candy around, my guy.

UuuUUHHH???

_{[Maurice feels sort of like he's been caught on one of those candid camera shows. Him? Eye candy? Her tone was so hard for him to puzzle out. She'd been just as confusing back at the hospital.]

[At least she wasn't mad!]}

It's--nice weather huh? Good for a-- a swim?

[Look in the bushes, Ashton Kutcher is waiting to Punk you!!!

That confusion, like he isn't quite sure if she's talking to him or not, just leaves the naga's grin turning predatory, mouth curling until her fangs are flashing in the sunlight, green eyes alight with interest.]

Is that an invitation, big guy?

_{[That smile sends his ears flipping backwards again but you could see he was putting real effort into making them stand upright. He was not going to let her freak him out! He wasn't!]

[He feels his cheeks growing hot as he decides to see if he can play this game too. Maurice bends forward and sort of slaps the surface of the water as though it were a vacant seat on a bench.]}

F-fine by me!

Edited 2019-06-14 04:39 (UTC)

[Oh, Lup just has to laugh at that very awkward move, amusement shining so clear against the sharpness of her features. But she slips off of her log anyway, moving riiiight up to the kelpie, grinning. Her gaze drags up and down him, just to keep the man on his hooves.]

You're real cute when you're nervous.

_{[Okay, Maurice grossly underestimated just how fast snakes could swim. Suddenly she is just THERE and Maurice nearly recreates that scene from Bambi where Bambi stumbles backwards through the reeds and lands on his little deer ass--but he doesn't!]

[He splays his hooves out and arches his back over backwards but he does not fall.]}

Thhaaaaaanks? You're. Pretty. Too?

_{[IS HE DOING IT? IS THIS JUST HOW CONVERSATIONS GO HERE?]}

Uh yeah. Pretty hot.

[It's okay, Maurice, she'll flirt with herself for you. It all works out.]

You come out here often? Pretty sure I'd remember seeing a cute horse splashing around my lake.

Not really...well...no. That's not true.

_{[He stretches his neck up a little and points toward the McGuckett household.]}

I got a friend lives over that way. He gave me my shoes. And there was that big party...so I guess I do! But not the pond. I was thinkin' of trying some kelpie stuff out.

_{[And for a moment, Maurice goes quiet. He remembers something. Something from months and months ago. Something Lup had said in the hospital when she'd conned him into causing a little havoc on the nursing staff. And so, out of the fucking blue:]}

What's vore?

[That's.

That's really out of the blue.

And Lup fucking loves it.

The naga looks taken back for only a split second, her bright, green eyes widening in surprise, scaled brows arching upwards under her bangs, but then she's bursting into barking laughter, loud and real and totally unrestrained. Oh no, he's so cute. She's going to keep him.]

If you wanna know you gotta pay the toll, my guy.

_{[Maurice forms a sort of pout when she starts guffawing at him.]}

I'v been thinkin' about it! Lady, I can't never tell if you're coming or going or if you're serious or not! What toll! Just let me see if I can breathe underwater or not!

[Look at that adorable lil pout. Lup's not at all fazed by it. If anything, she looks more delighted.]

A lady's gotta be mysterious, thug. Gotta keep you on your hooves.

[But she finally relents, only slightly, to give Maurice the space he needs to take a big, ol' dive right into the lake.]

Have at it. Free of charge. Just for today.

Mysterious...okay. That's fair, I guess.

_{[He's not suuuper into that answer but, well, she's given him permission to go do his silly splashing around!]

[Maurice tip-hoofs around her as though he expects her to strike out at him. Once he feels like he's out of range, he turns back to the pond. During their exchange, he almost forgot how beautiful it was. Slowly the kelpie wades out until the water is around his shoulders.]}

Honestly, I'm kinda glad you're here. You know. Just in case.

_{[Without further ado, Maurice dips under the water and instantly comes back up spluttering.]}

Do-over! That wasn't it, I'm gonna do it, hang on!

_{[He disappears beneath the surface again and this time he's gone for most of a minute. A few bubbles surface. Shortly after that, an entire horse bursts from the lake's surface and yells a man yell.]}

MY HANDS ARE GOOOOOOOOOOOONE!

[The sincerity in his tone makes the naga roll her eyes, but she's grinning while she slides forward, just to the edge of the lake, scaly arms crossed over her chest. She should probably be watching him more, to make sure the kelpie doesn't trip over his own damn hooves and drown against all odds, but the water reflects against her scales, makes them shimmer even more beautifully than they already are, all of the reds and oranges and yellows simply dazzling.

Soo it's only natural her gaze drops down to her own gorgeous tail, admiring herself.

Until she hears Maurice sputtering and her head jerks up.]

Just be glad I'm not snapping pics of this for the network!

[But then he dips down and returns as a full grown horse. A screaming horse.

And Lup nearly tumbles backwards from the force of her laughter.]

Ho - Holy fuck! You've never gone full horse before?! I'm gonna puke!

NO!

_{[But it came out as NOOH-HOH-HOH-HOH. Because he's a fucking horse now and it's a lot. Maurice abandons his quest for underwater breathing in favor of plunging awkwardly toward the shore. Toward Lup. With his big ass hooves.]}

THIS IS STUPID AND I HATE IT!

_{[He'd shape-shifted before back home and it had never just HAPPENED like this.]}

[Bring it!! Lup is laughing way too much - full body shaking now - to even care there is a goddamn horse stumbling right her way. She even slaps a hand against her brightly-colored hip, shrieking out in laughter.]

This - This is the best thing I've ever seen!! A million times better than Bar goin' full slime that one time! Fuck, I'm gonna friggin' vom!

_{[Lup had best get her vom on because Maurice has arrived and he's bad at how horse legs bend.]}

Shut up! Shut up! Shut--WOAH!!!

_{[He tries to step over her and just full on trips. He's a lot.]}

[He's a lot but also THIS is a lot.

Lup's still cackling when Maurice comes racing at her, furious and offended and dripping from the lake, but then he's stumbling and falling all over her, a tangle of long horse legs and her winding, thicc snake body, an absolute mess of a monster.

She tries to reach for his face, to push him off of her, but her hand pushes at the man's chest instead.]

What the - Get your horse butt offa me!

_{[The horse's broad chest instantly adheres to Lup's hand.]}

I'm trying! My eyes are on the sides of my head I can't tell what way's up!

_{[Maurice twisted his oddly shaped body and tried to roll off of Lup but ended up just rolling her up with him like the world's worst katamari.]}

Ah shit! Shit! I'm sorry!

_{[He tries to stand but it's all bambi on ice except the ice is mud.]}

[hey op, do you take constructive criticism??????]

What the fuck - !

[It doesn't help that her long, coiling body just makes for the perfect rolling into a ball shape, katamari-ing into Maurice with way more ease than she'd like to ever actually admit.]

This is harassment, buddy!

_{[Maurice attempts to explain himself but all that comes out is a WHEEERRRHERRRHERRRHERRHERRR of dismay. He's not a harasser! He's a good boy! He's doing his best! HE JUST WANTED TO GO SWIMMING]

[Swimming! The water! That could wash off the sticky! The horse lurches to his hooves, forelegs splayed, and starts high-stepping back toward the shallows.]}

I'm fixin' it!

[This is what swimming gets you, Maurice! Sent right straight to hell!

There's Lup, flailing around while she's completely stuck to a whole ass entire horse, trying so desperately to summon the strength to just remove herself from this situation, but then she sees the metaphorical lightbulb click over Maurice's head. And it clicks in hers just as quick. He wouldn't...]

Don't you - [Too late.] NO! Don't you dare drown me in the lake, I swear to Pan, I'm gonna swallow your horse ass whole if you fuckin' kill me -

If you don't wanna drown, close your BIG MOUTH!

_{[His ears are blazing hot with embarrassment an frustration and a little honest to goodness anger but once the shallows rise up to his sides he starts to turn in place to find better footing.]

[Ahd then he shakes all over like a huge sticky dog.]}

OFF! OFF! OFF! OFF!

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You Can Lead a Horse to Water {closed to Lup}

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